"Why would anyone want to have another child after going though the terrible 2s! I know I don't."
I got a lot I comments about it. Mostly that you will want to have more except for one of my Guy Friend who finds me inspirational every time I post something that Riley did bad as more of a reason to get a vasectomy! LOL
After about 7 comment on that I would want another one...
I commented...
"Riley was such a good baby I think I'm getting paid back big time for that! Number 1Why I don't want more is I don't want to be Pregnant again I hate feeling sick and not too happy about having my stomach cut open to have another one. Number 2. They are expensive and we can't afford another one. I don't know how people afford more the one kid with only one parent working.
And a Number 3 I'm adding now I wonder how Riley would take to a new baby. She just about bet poor little Chloe down when she stepped into Riley's spot light of being the only girl!
I didn't get to many comments back on how people afford it. One person said "You make it work". And in another comment she wrote about using cloth diapers and nursing to save money and cutting thing out to get what's really important to you.
Months ago I added it all up based on what we use to get for Riley for just Diapers and Formal alone it's over 200 bucks a month for a baby. Now I did not nurse Riley. I'm not going to get in a all out war about this and I support women who choose to breastfeed but it's not poison to the baby they way some people make it out. That just really upsets me on some of the things I have read. Some people just cannot nurse they try and they try and there body just doesn't produce the milk.
I did not breastfeed because I was on and still am on Medication that you cannot breastfeed on. And it was not a option for me to go off it. Because if I did she wouldn't have gotten fed half the time because I was sick with IBS. Zach loved feeding Riley and so did my mother. I remember her waiting on her toes at the hospital the day after Riley was born for her chance to feed her!
Anyways with that being said it will cost us more a month then it does for people who nurse. I just cannot fathom how people with more then one child where only one person works can do it. I know a lot of people are able to get W.I.C. because of there income level and let me tell you I would have L.O.V.E to have that! Free formula would have just rocked and most likely if that was the case now we would have had another by now. But Zach makes too much money for that which is comical in it own way because we struggle every month just to make ends meet. I remember signing everyone and there mother up for those formula coupons just to get some relief from the 28 bucks we would plunk down every 5 days to feed Riley and then having to by baby food when she got older.
Now Zach makes a modest salary he has a professional job he is a engineer. Now he does not make what he could make living in other state but he also has a nice stable schedule and is home by 6pm every night unlike he would somewhere else.
We have a mortgage, 2 car payments, regular utility bills, cell phone, cable, and student loans. We barley put anything a way a month for savings and everything is on a shoe string budget so tight if you plucked it it would make a nice high note!
So I honestly do not know how people do it or were they cut things! I know the best prices I can get for groceries and things which is Super Walmart. I'm not a coupon clipper because everything I find that we use you have to buy 2 or 3 of and lets face it that's not saving money.
So tell me my very tiny group of readers how do you afford more then one child when you cannot get any type of assists.
Money was really tight when we had Madeline. Our rent had a lot to do with it. We literally ate pancaked for 4 days straight because we had nothing else to eat and no money to get anything. As soon as our lease was up we moved to a little apartment to attempt to save money. We didn't buy her tons of toys. We waited for christmas or her birthday to get her anything.
ReplyDeleteWe stopped buying junk foods and quick coffee drinks and soda's at the store. Sure, it's only a dollar, but if you go every day that's $30 a month. And sometimes you'll get a pack of gum, some mints, etc... it all adds up.
We stopped going out to dinner. AT ALL. all meals were made from scratch at home. It's the cheapest and healthiest form of eating. Madeline's baby food was what we had for dinner. I puree'd what we were having and fed it to her. (this was done for jack as well). We stopped going out to the movies and cut cable. Cable can be over a hundred bucks a month! (that's half the cost of another baby according to your calculations!) We picked up a subscription to netflix and can have movies sent to us when they're released. Cutting cable also helps with the sitting in front of the tv all day.
When we had jack we used all of Madeline's baby things. Again I was able to nurse so we never had to pay for formula. He didn't start actual food until we was about 10 months old... cuts down on a grocery bill. We had a lot of gender neutral toys from when madeline was born so we asked for cloth diapers for christmas. that cut out the need for spending cash on diapers. (cont...)
(oy... check out those spelling mistakes)
ReplyDeletejack was easy. we were given tons of hand me down clothes and we're still being given clothes for him. it's really a blessing... but if we need to buy something i scout out clearance racks at target and wait until it's all 75% off. Or I'll go to really nice area's and shop their good will. Everything is babygap or old navy and prefectly clean. We shop at those big baby sales too. Can't beat a bundle of clothes for $3.00. If there's an occassion that I'd like the children to look nice... then I'll purchase something for it but I attempt to make sure it's suitable for a few different occasions.
Then... we sold our house and built a new one. It's twice the size of our old house and the lot is nearly 3 times as big. Having a big yard is important and encourages us to stay home and hang out here. Everything is energy efficient as opposed to the 100 yr old home in Lakewood... not to mention the taxes are WAY cheaper. We're only spending a few hundred more a month to live here as opposed to our old home. Utilities are all much less expensive.
And as for baby number 3, wether it's a boy or a girl I have clothing. I'll nurse this child as well and use cloth diapers. Making the cost of the baby next to nothing for it's first year. The child won't really need any toys so probably won't be getting any until he/she is old enough to develop a personality. I'll use that money I would have spent on toys for a new stroller and car seat to ensure safety.
Mike and I also don't have a car payment. We bought our cars used and payed in full. Becuase they're a few years old insurance is next to nothing as well. Honestly... there are still things we can cut to save money. It really is about finding what's important to you. I cut Mike's hair, I let mine grow out and certianly don't go in for regular cuts. I cut the kid's hair... that saves a ton of money. If we want to go out with friends we'll do group dates with pot lucks and everyone brings a dish to share. That way no one has to deal with cranky kids at a restaurant and we don't oay restaurant prices.
And my new photography job is really just a way for me to get out of the house. All money earned just goes back into buying equipment.
3. i want to be a full blown photographer when the kids are in school and i actually head back to work. so i decided to start now, learn everything i needed to learn (without going to school and having to pay someone to teach me what i could learn on my own). money saved. and money earned... because during all of this i'm still getting paid which pays for my camera equipment.
ReplyDeletelet's see... costco.. we buy all meats at wholesale. saves a TON of cash. giant bags of rice and potato's. and costco provides pretty healthy options for meats. they're full of all the good stuff and better for you than dollar store brands like walmart and aldi's. plus... they're less expensive. better for you and it costs less. you just have to get over the initial shock of having to spend a ton right away... but we started out buying a little at a time to build a supply. they also sell lots of organic products at great prices so the items we think are necessary to buy organic (like eggs) are cheaper at costco as opposed to giant eagle. we research anything before we buy it. mike just bought a new tv because we sold our last one with the house in order to get someone to buy the house. (it worked) so he searched all over for months before getting a new one for the best possible price. we do this with everything.
I clip coupons on a regular basis. also I check the internet for coupons all the time. also we do a lot of shopping at aldis and we have a costco membership. that saves us tons of money. I can get 3 weeks worth of meat there for like 60. now remeber thats feeding 5 ppl plus there is usually left overs. I waited 6 1/2 yrs after belle to have evelyn. that helped! With Evelyn I only used target diapers, wipes, soap, etc. she had to be on special formula cause she is lactose intolerant and had acid reflex. I tried nursing but it didn't matter what I took out of my diet she still puked and screamed. Also with Evelyn we made the choice to not have cable or internet and both my ex and I drove paid off cars however if rob and I were to have another one now we would have 1 car payment plus a mortgage and all the other bills. yes I get child support for both my girls but believe me what I get makes up for what rob pays a month in child support. We have talked about what we would do if we were to have more now. Here is what we have come up with. We would only use the target brand stuff again. I would try nursing again but if it didn't work the off brand formula is just as good as the name brand. It is all regulated by the fda. and the off brand is like half the price. also we would do more biking/walking to the store to save on gas. not to mention we are very strict on lights being turned off and we put plastic up and our motto is get a blanket in the winter. we turned down our hot water tank which has saved money on gas and water cause the shower get colder faster. we installed a dual flush system into our toilet. when you flush for pee it only uses about half the amount of water that it does for #2. it was about $30 and very easy to install. also we wash everything on cold using tide for cold water(they have a free and clear kind) between all of that my water bill went down 60 a billing cycle. also now that its summer my gas bill is way down. great time to save money. also when I was pregnant with evelyn I would buy a pack of diapers everytime my ex got paid. this way it wasn't a huge shock to have to buy both diapers and formula after the baby was born. it helped so much. anyway I hope this helps and if you ever want to go to costco let me know. they don't mind guests.
ReplyDeleteFor Riley's diapers I did a ton of price comparing and we bought Luvs they were cheaper then a store brand. I always figured out price per-diaper For Wipes I used the Equate brand from Wal-Mart they were just has good has Huggies Thick Wipes and more then half the cost. Our Cable we kept because that was our form of entertainment we pay way less now because we got went with Direct TV. We always have Internet because Zach used it to work. He tutored math online. I've been to Costco and BJ's and did the price comparison for what we usually buy and it's not any cheaper, at least not to make up for the member ship fees. I switched to Cold Water Pyrex. It’s only 5 bucks for a bottle the same size as Tide, which was so expensive I almost passed out! LOL I only shop every two weeks to cut down on gas and I was shopping at Adli's but I can get the same stuff at Super Wal-Mart for less and don't have to make 2 trips. Fr her clothes I WAS really bad in the beginning but I learned to buy her only what see needed and things that were on sale. No one I know has a girl that’s older then Riley so I never get hand me downs but I give her clothes to my one friend and then she gives them back for my sister for her twins. So I’m hoping I will get clothes re-gifted to me for a boy or girl (Wink, Wink) I think what really kills us is the 2 car payments. But Zach drives all the way to the eastside everyday for work so he needs a good car and I wanted something safe for Riley to ride in and our old van was getting in bad shape so we got a newer used one.
ReplyDeleteMy other question is about Pre-School do you or are you sending your child. Riley will be going in the fall and that’s 90 bucks a month she really needs interaction with other children and we want her to be well prepared for school.
So, do you want another baby...or does Zach want another baby...or do you just think you SHOULD have another baby?
ReplyDeleteZach and i would both like another baby. I would totally have one by know if I dind't have to be pregnant and money wasn't an issue. A lot od people are having there 2nd or 3rd babies and I want to know how the afford it I always have wondered!
ReplyDeleteEvelyn will be going to preschool in the fall. assuming she keeps going potty. she is still fighting the fact that she should pee on the potty. But if not then we are going to be doing lots of play groups. I print out alot of preschool sheets for her to do at home and have bought a couple of workbooks for her as well. We also do crafts like crazy. she asks everyday when we are going to crafts. personally I wouldn't mind keeping her home til shes 4. the thought of pying 90 s month for 2 days a week makes me nuts. also I have a set of plastic canvas letters that my grandparents made me that we play with. I agree with you on the cable. we kept ours too. Rob and I are always on the internet and really I love my dvr. its so nice to watch my shows when the girls are sleeping. but we did lower our package with saved us about 30 a month.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all - Riley WILL accept another baby just as all other oldest siblings accept their little brother or sister. Siblings do fight, that cannot be helped. Jennifer was an only child for five years and adjusted to two younger sisters very well.
ReplyDeleteSecond - I have to agree with the comment that "you make it work" financially. We rented for over ten years because we prioritized what was important: clothes, shoes, pre-school, having Mom at home. We didn't buy toys every time we went to the store, birthday parties were small, unless it was a milestone birthday, Christmas was budgeted - oh yes, there were many times we had to say "no" to ponies, private music lessons, big vacations. Many, many things did not get done to the house until after I went back to work and our girls were older.
It depends on what you and Zach want - If you want a more expensive home, a big vacation every year, new toys for Riley through the year other than birthdays and Christmas - then you are better off having only one child. But don't base having another child on the fact that Riley may not accept him or her - because I guarantee you she will.